Never say forever 'cause nothing lasts
A few things you need to know:
1. The picture below is not a frozen waterfall. That is Mammoth Hot Springs in Yellowstone. Up from the ground comes a bubblin' hot water, laden with minerals, and those are the deposits left behind. Those deposits are called travertine. It is pretty nifty how they form those wedding-cake-ish geometrical formations.
2. That is a coyote, not a wolf.
3. I do not have strep. It is a viral throat infection, which, if I am lucky, will continue to cause excruciating pain in my throat, and then decide to migrate down into my lungs for an equally painful cough. Sweet. Just when I am supposed to be doing my big training push for the opening of snowboarding season on Thanksgiving.
4. I just Costanza'd a leftover Halloween Twix out of my garbage. I had just dropped it in there myself, and it was still mostly wrapped, so I went to reach for it. I also had taken out the garbage last night, so it wasn't too nasty.
I had the slippery little bastard in my clutches, and then it escaped, swimming deeper.
Rather than give up, I went deeper, to my elbow.
I came close, but it slipped all the way down.
So, I went in as deep as my shoulder, rooting around for it.
I began to smell things I had thrown away yesterday.
If you know me, though, you know I am not a quitter.
I fished that fucker out and ate it.
You know how Twix has that delicious, crunchy cookie center?
Remember my little throat problem from # 3?
Yeah, so basically I went into the garbage to my elbow to fish out a candy bar that felt like broken glass going down.
And, ladies?
I'm pretty much single now.
The line starts over there.
1. The picture below is not a frozen waterfall. That is Mammoth Hot Springs in Yellowstone. Up from the ground comes a bubblin' hot water, laden with minerals, and those are the deposits left behind. Those deposits are called travertine. It is pretty nifty how they form those wedding-cake-ish geometrical formations.
2. That is a coyote, not a wolf.
3. I do not have strep. It is a viral throat infection, which, if I am lucky, will continue to cause excruciating pain in my throat, and then decide to migrate down into my lungs for an equally painful cough. Sweet. Just when I am supposed to be doing my big training push for the opening of snowboarding season on Thanksgiving.
4. I just Costanza'd a leftover Halloween Twix out of my garbage. I had just dropped it in there myself, and it was still mostly wrapped, so I went to reach for it. I also had taken out the garbage last night, so it wasn't too nasty.
I had the slippery little bastard in my clutches, and then it escaped, swimming deeper.
Rather than give up, I went deeper, to my elbow.
I came close, but it slipped all the way down.
So, I went in as deep as my shoulder, rooting around for it.
I began to smell things I had thrown away yesterday.
If you know me, though, you know I am not a quitter.
I fished that fucker out and ate it.
You know how Twix has that delicious, crunchy cookie center?
Remember my little throat problem from # 3?
Yeah, so basically I went into the garbage to my elbow to fish out a candy bar that felt like broken glass going down.
And, ladies?
I'm pretty much single now.
The line starts over there.
posted by Joe at
1:06 PM
4 Comments:
Hello Joe...I'm new here. I found my way from a bridge on a LONELY ROAD & PSYCOPATH.
Anyway...just wanted to say I found your site amusing and entertaining. It made me smile. Thank you.
Travertine? Like the stuff they tile floors with? Cool.
I would like to say something encouraging about your singlehood, but can't come up with anything that doesn't sound callous or flippant. So, yeah. I could say that I wish I were 10 years younger, single, and stunningly gorgeous. So, there you go. How about I just monitor the line that forms, kinda like a bodyguard? Maybe I can borrow those gold high-heeled boots so I am even more intimidating...but then I'd have to duck for doorways. Anyway, take care, Dude, and hope your throat gets better fast--and quit eating out of the garbage, already.
You can Costanza all you want. You're still a babe.
"...If you know me, though, you know I am not a quitter....bwaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
(thought process before the " continuation of the dribble"?)
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