She was a fast machine, she kept her motor cleanShe was the best damn woman that I ever seen

So, Friday was the first part of my 20th class reunion.



It was the informal part, at a bar.



There was this girl we graduated with. Apparently, sometime within the last 20 years she went out and got herself a huge set of fake tits, some regrettable tatoos and dyed her hair blond.



Like a moth to flame, Quagmire was drawn.



Her charms were on display, and stretchmarks beckoned.



Ah, yes.



Inside, he knew it would be a Bad Decision.



Our intrepid hero experienced what alcoholics refer to as a "moment of clarity."



He said to Stanette, "I think I could hit that."



She said, "Craig, don't."



"Dude, look at that. You will hate yourself in the morning."



Sage advice.



Quagmire responded, "Maybe."



Stanette said, "And tomorrow is the big dinner and dance, and it will be really awkward."



Craig said, "Yeah, but waht if it's really fun, and I could do it again tomorrow?"



Quagmire, you magnificent bastard.