Wednesday, December 05, 2007

This is not a lyric.
Listen to this video.
If you know me and you read this... then listen

I finished Ron Wood's autobiography last night.


He played with Jeff Beck. He lived with Jimi Hendrix. He had an affair with George Harrison's wife before Clapton wrote Layla about her. (Re-read that last sentence and let it soak in. I'll wait. Yeah.) After that, he wrote a bunch of mediocre songs like Maggie May and Every Picture Tells a Story with Rod Stewart and the Faces, then he toured the world.

After that, he partied a little, met Bob Marley, toured with Bo Diddley, crashed Keith Moon's car, and spent a week in jail in a third world country.

Then Mick Jagger calls and says, dude, you wanna play guitar with me and Keith?

True story.

And also, he got arrested in Arkansas with Keith, trying to drive to their next gig. The plane was delayed, and it was only 500 miles. And Keith said he could rent a car and drive. Great idea. Why didn't I think of that?

Keith, you drive

He (Ron, not Keith, not necessarily, anyway)) also had a bit of a drug problem, went broke and sold his house to Pete Townshend.

True Story.

Ron Wood.

He is the most unheralded, absolutely ridiculous rock star in history.

Listen to those videos, and prove me wrong. I defy you.

Listen, and the go ahead and comment.

Ron Wood.

I know your name is Rita
Since your perfume's smelling sweeter

^^Now that is some music.

Let me ask you...

Do you have a dream?

Do you hope for something, someday?

Something that will come true?

Like maybe you want to retire in Florida, play some golf... maybe see your grandkids?


Do you want to quit your job?

Do you hate it?

Are you who you thought you would be when you were 12?

If not, why not?

Are you happy?

Is it someone else's fault?



Poor you.

Quit your bitching, seriously.

Nobody cares about your problems, and we sure as shit don't want to hear about your feelings.

Wanna smoke? I'm gonna have a smoke, what ... you don't smoke, huh?

What are you, one of those fitness freaks?

Go fuck yourself.

(Alec Baldwin, ladies and gentlemen.)

Why are you reading this in lieu of having some fun of your own?

That's right, I said lieu.