Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Promise you
Heaven true
Let me take a ride
Hurt myself

What a year. Highs, lows, and absolutely no middle ground.

The highs are soaring, and the lows scrape the bottom corner of the abyss.

The thing is that they keep coming.

I imagine it will end.

We'll plant a garden or something. Go to Home Depot. Take a walk or watch t.v.

There is a world just beneath the surface of all the things you see. The guy in the truck at the stoplight. The teller at the bank. The stoned dude who puts the cream cheese on the bagel. The chick with the tattoo. The rusted out car with the locked glove compartment. The bass player... what's his story?

If you dig even deeper, there are cells and amoebas, fighting the good fight; cells dividing and dying on a grand scale.

I was having a bad day. I went to the gym for a couple hours. That didn't get rid of it. I came home and played some guitar. That didn't do it, at first.

I cooked dinner, a turkey tenderloin, rubbed with garlic and lemon, pepper, sea salt, and a bunch of other goodness.

Now that helped.

Then, I talked to Will.

He was shagging flies at his daughter's softball game, just beyond the shortstop.

Deep left field, for 8-year-olds.

He was laughing because both teams cheer the pitcher and the batter on the same play.

"I swear, it's like they were born to be losers."

"Nobody cares about the score?"

"Well, there's that one kid with the eye of the tiger, running the bases with abandon... She cares."

"One day, she'll grow up to be a lesbian."

"One day."

That really helped.

The turkey turned out good. I served it with kale after she did hot yoga.

(No matter how shitty I feel, doing yoga in a 105 degree room with thirty sweaty hippies?

I don't find that helpful. I'm not that spiritual. I don't buy grains in bulk.

White people with dreads give me douche chills.)

Practice, work, play, try, stand, feel, come, care, give, go, cry, ask, smile, kick, scream, doubt, share, roar, burn, and laugh.

And Wednesday gives up the ghost on the see-saw; Thursday drops its lunchbox and squeals as the week tilts over and slams into the sand, victorious with the promise of the weekend.