Thursday, May 07, 2009

I'm thinking about my doorbell
When you gonna ring it?
When you gonna ring it?

Since the advent of Stanette going to "hot yoga" classes the last couple weeks, which to be fair, I purchased for her in the form of a birthday gift certificate, I have been forced to fend for myself in the arena of dinner preparation.

(I know, I know. This shit better not last long, or she's gonna be coming home to a bucket of KFC.)

(I kid, I kid.)

(Not really. What's wrong with KFC? Not a thing.)

Anyway, here is what I did tonight:

2 chicken breasts, 8 oz of soba noodles, one yellow bell pepper, one orange bell pepper (that's what we had... green would be fine), one jalapeno pepper, small bunch of scallions, one bottle of thai peanut sauce, pepper, salt, whatever spices.

-Start water boiling in a pot for the soba noodles. You only need 5 minutes for soba noodles. It's just good to get his started ahead of time. I am a fiend about eating food while it is hot.

-Cut up the scallions.

-Spray a small frying pan with pam. (Or whatever frying pan you have a matching cover for.) Put the chicken breasts in the pan, add water until the chicken breasts are, you know, surronded by water. You don't need to cover them, you just want enough so they kind of fry-boil. I cracked some pepper over the breasts, along with some kind of Paula Deen spice mix and some sea salt. Put the diced scallions all over the chicken. Cover it, and let it cook on high for about 15 minutes.

-That happens for 15 minutes. No need to flip the chicken or anything, besides, you're gonna be busy.

-Chop up the bell peppers, slice and dice them fine. Cut up the jalapeno. I like to leave the seeds, since we like spicy. If you don't, get rid of the seeds or the jalapeno altogether. Also, even if you wash your hands three or four times in this process, sit down to eat and then decide to blog... and you touch your eye, it's going to burn like mace.

Not that I have been maced.


-OK, that should've taken ten minutes, and you have five left. Throw the soba noodles in the boiling water.

-Put the finely diced, later-to-mace-you, peppers in a bowl.

-Chicken's done? Soba has boiled for five? Take the chicken off the heat, strain the soba noodles in the sink and pour them on top of the fresh peppers. This will cook them a little, but will still give you some crunch.

-Take the chicken, put it in a bowl and take two forks and shred it. You basically hold the chicken with one fork and shred it with the grain with the other. It's kind of a pain in the ass, but the end result is worth it.

-Add the shredded chicken to the bowl of pasta-on-later-to-mace-you peppers. Pour, of, like half the bottle of peanut sauce on the whole thing. Then get two serving spoons and toss it like you would toss a salad. (Outside of prison, of course.)



It is dumping snow on top of the green-green foothills outside my house. Spring is a strange beast when you are at 4500 feet elevation, in a valley surrounded by 10-11,000 foot mountains.

On another note, there was this chick at the gym tonight that a girlfriend needs to pull aside. There are certain shorts that certain people shold not wear. Most of us have an internal filter, or maybe a mirror, that provides this advice.

Jeebers, I had to get off the step mill thing and move to another machine. It was like a car wreck. I couldn't look away. I can only imagine the look on my face.

Well, that's it.

I am going to watch that Swedish vampire movie. "Let the Right One In."

We made it to Thursday. We can slouch it through 8 hours tomorrow before we can enjoy two and a half days of YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!